sleeping with the enemy

I didn’t sleep a wink last nite. For the uninformed, I’m living in a villa (ok I dun think it’s a villa, more like a semi-detached house) here in Shenzhen, and I’m occupying the guest room. Here in the guest room there are 2 beds. One is of course mine, while the other is taken by those Singaporeans who stay in Shenzhen on a temporary basis.

Yesterday when I came home from 东门, which is the shopping district, I saw a suitcase and a laptop bag in my room. The suitcase looked familiar, so I thought it was the guy that bunked in with me during my first week. I talked to jac jac for a while, read my book, and shortly went to bed.

I was surprisingly awoken when someone opened my door and shouted “Hey brudder!” In my semi-asleep semi confused state, I awoke and saw a guy. It took me a while to realize that this wasn’t the same guy as the other time. And it took me a while to realize the luggage was his. Then it took me a while to realize the dude was drunk. Shit, just what I need, a drunk roommate.

The dude, asked me my name after every two sentences. At first I thought he was like m, goldfish memory and all. Then I realized this guy was really Dory from Finding Nemo. I shook his hand and told him my name at least 10 times during our conversation. And he said a lot of wiiiieeeeerrrdddd things. For one, I can really tell the dude was unhappy. And I half believe he is unhappy with the company, and unhappy at being in Shenzhen. After a while he left the room.

I tried to go back to sleep but I was just too wierded out. I thought I was dreaming, or I was hearing things. And I needed to take a piss so I got up to go to the toilet. Then I confirmed I wasn’t dreaming. The dude was sitting in the living room, smoking. I took my piss and on the way back, decided to talk to the dude again to make sure our previous encounter was what I thought it was. Again, I had to shake his hand and introduce myself all over. Then he started telling me even weirder things. One of which made me fear for my own safety. He said his goal was to make all the managers lie down, then did the slit throat gesture, then said he’d make them his pillow. I was like whhhhaaaatttt ttthhhhheeee faaaaarrrkkk was that man. The worst part is I couldn’t really tell if the dude was just talking drunk or he really meant what he said. I told myself this is one dude I’m not about to piss off, so I cut the conversation short and went to bed.

I couldn’t sleep a wink. I kept thinking about my own safety. I mean if this dude snaps while I am sleeping the AIG travel insurance I bought is not going to even cover my right testicle. I can imagine the conversation with my parents, “Sorry Mr and Mrs Tan, your son was killed in his sleep, our insurance does not cover this sort of mishap.” Holy shit, I kept telling myself, holy shit. Then while I was desperately trying to fall asleep, I heard the big boss Mr Chow come back. And he got into an argument with the dude. Apparently it was already 2.40am and the dude was drinking alcohol and smoking in the living room. Mr Chow threatened to fire the dude. In all honesty, I was telling myself that couldn’t come sooner. I shouldn’t I know. But I was hoping for anything that would distance myself away from the dude.

Shortly, he came back into the room, and I was on hyper-alert. To my relief, I heard the sheets ruffle a bit then there was silence. I gave a silent prayer to god. Good time to be religious. I found myself making plans. Should I find a hotel for a couple of days? What about my important stuff? On top of my head I told myself bare minimum I need: Money, passport, airticket, wallet and laptop. I made a plan, in the morning while the dude is bathing I’ll chuck all my important stuff in one bag and pass it to Phillipe, the Filipino whom I met on Saturday. He’s the only one I really know and trust in the house.

Who is this guy anyway?